Only a few things can either make one or break one... Autism is on that list. Looking back to that
gruesome tragedy of the Sandy Hook massacre, I remembered feeling somber to
being bewildered. The news surely brought sorrow to everyone but upon knowing the
perpetrator was one on the Autism spectrum, my whole world started to crumble.
It got me blindfolded to the possibilities of a beautiful world and the hope of
raising my autistic son well was lost. There were few moments when I had the
strength to conquer almost anything but many times, disappointments about
Autism drown me so I got tempted not to take responsibility. Nevertheless, this
disorder has given our family formidable limitations that the pain of not
acting upon it was more intense than getting up and slapping self-pity on its
face saying, “Enough with regrets, fear and pessimism. I choose to take this
lead because if I don't who else will?" So this journey continues...
If something really matters, we can give it a fight like
there's no other way out but forward; burn our bridges so it is either die or
arise stronger than ever. My husband and I prayed so hard before we decided to
live only on one income so I can take care of our two beautiful kids, one who
is almost a teenager and the other one, who has Autism. Making that decision
meant putting a lot of hardwork to plan. It also involved a great amount of
sacrifice to work more overtime and overnight shifts in order to get a
financial heads up. While the rest of the world is spending on items to cater
their whims, my husband and I tried to live by what we already have. We looked
back during the inception stage of our marriage wherein we dug on trash bins to
find something to sell on craigslist in order to supplement our livelihood and
remembered feeling so blessed then. For that reason, we both have always
believed that we can be committed to our goal because it seems doable and as
much as it is for a greater purpose, we also know that God intended to give us
this Autism challenge to encourage us to keep reaching for what others seem to
be impossible.
After I submitted my notice to go from full-time to as-need,
the chaotic situation at home was beginning to subdue. The kids have been
eagerly and independently working on their tasks. My daughter has never been
happier. My son has been scripting less and has been finishing his homework’s
with little or no prompting. The stress level in our household has plummeted
since laughter and contentment dominated the place. The most exciting part is
the change it brought to our financial health. We are 50% closer to paying off
our mortgage.
Whatever decision we come up with, it has always been the
result of many nights of constant deliberation, taking into consideration
calculated risks and love and respect for each other. When a decision is made,
we agree to support it, work for it and be committed to make it happen. That is
our secret to reaching our goal, and that should always be the number one
priority upon establishing a family's mission. The rest are some of the ways
that have impacted us in living a life of fruition and intention. There are
days or nights when one or many may not have seemed to be working but after a
constant follow through and perseverance for trials and errors, we have
narrowed down the list to these few:
1. We set a budget. I admit, we have tweaked it several
times and finally settled to an amount that is reasonable and livable.
2. We stick to the budget. There are few hard days wherein
we get tempted to transfer funds from our cash cushion investment account to
our checking account just so we can a make a big purchase. However, because we
have a written goal placed on a conspicuous place, we have just but exchanged a
sigh of relief and a came upon a realization that a breadmaker or a beautiful
furniture is not as important as paying off mortgage and living a life fully
lived.
3. We budget through one income. As I have mentioned above
that I am not anymore working full time but only as needed. The incomes I get
on the side are considered "our unprecedented gifts from above". We
don't include that in our budget so any more money that comes goes directly to
the mortgage pay off.
4. We Invest to Give, Invest to Save, and Invest to Spend.
Investing through mutual funds or simply contributing to it monthly helps us
gain traction when the need to give, to save or to spend arise.
5. We celebrate zero-expense days because everything we need
is already in our pantry and the joy of being at home just simply talking to
each other, listening to each other's stories, enjoying nature together as a
family, tackling on a house project and volunteering are some ways we rock this
world the frugal way.
6. We always seek God and invoke the Holy Spirit and
whatever we say or do.
Before Autism, we felt the need to work to build wealth
without a goal. There could have been no amount of books or advice to teach us
that wealth is not built on purposeless ways of raising our family.
Wealth is certainly not built upon a relationship rich of
material gains but poor in communication due to fatigue, irritability and
personal agenda. At any rate, wealth is an abundance of anything that money cannot
afford. If money is used to purposely build a plethora of priceless wealth,
like giving to charity, saving to avoid debt and spending to live, then that's
a life worth living.
Due to our challenge with Autism, wealth for us is redefined
as life with a purpose in the fullness of God's grace.
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